Interlude

It's somewhat amazing how small cultural differences can seem so huge.

I'm not thinking of any one thing in particular at the moment so I suppose that it's many small ones all added up but isn't that how culture shock works?  I think I might be hyper-aware of all that right now, being overtired and somewhat homesick but that is generally when I get ambushed by these sorts of things.

Everything that has a negative impact seems worse than it actually is and you worry more than you need to even as you're telling yourself "it's really not that bad".  I miss the familiar.  The odd familiar.  The right trees, the right tones and intonations.  Or right for me anyway.

At the same time I can enjoy things.  The people I'm meeting, how pretty it is, how old somethings are, the transit system (or what I've seen of it).  But I'm still tired and over-experiencing, over-processing, over-feeling, whatever you want to call it.  It's not comfortable.  And even when you know intellectually that it'll be better with sleep and should mostly go away eventually you still cry and say "It's not better now!"

All I can do is read a book to distract myself and go to sleep.  And hope it is better in the morning.

Sometimes a year can seem like an eternity.  Especially at the beginning.